Tamekia MizLadi Smith: How to Train Employees to Have Difficult Conversations [Ted Talk] It’s time to invest in face-to-face training that empowers employees to have difficult conversations, says Tamekia MizLadi Smith. Difficult Conversations: How To Talk Politics Around The Dinner Table This Holiday Kassia Binkowski. But when we say “Let’s talk” to our teenagers, alarm bells go off in their brains and the shutters come down, making it pretty much impossible for a meaningful conversation to happen. We Have to Talk: A Step-By-Step Checklist for Difficult Conversations by Judy Ringer [Watch a short video about difficult conversations] Think of a conversation you’ve been putting off. The mere thought of having these difficult conversations fills you with anxiety, and distracts you from other work. There’s no reason to fluff out the conversation with unnecessary filler like fake pleasantries and “compliment sandwiches.” Instead, we all need greater levels of emotional agility to thrive and succeed in our endeavors. I don’t have the words to describe this talk and there aren’t enough words on this page to quote it without quoting each line, which would then fall flat compared with this TED talk. And then somebody, I can't remember who it was, repackaged it as the concept lean in the late '80s, I think, and … Public radio host Celeste Headlee has lots of experience with difficult conversations… How to get them to open up and when to talk to them about things that are uncomfortable for you both. Clarify that you know that you have different perspectives and that you want to work together to have a better understanding of those perspectives. How to Have Difficult Conversations. It's time to invest in face-to-face training that empowers employees to have difficult conversations, says Tamekia MizLadi Smith. Assuming you approached the person beforehand, they know you’re going to be having a difficult conversation and will have mentally prepared for it. Access Our Webinar! Don’t try to educate anyone. It’s never comfortable to be on either side of a difficult conversation. Got it? Sometimes these difficult conversations at your work are impossible to avoid. These 4 TED Talks Can Help Short but powerful ideas to make you more comfortable giving and receiving feedback. Glorious. In a witty, provocative talk, Smith shares a workplace training program called "I'm G.R.A.C.E.D." I thought confrontation should be avoided at all cost and it took me ages to realize that by avoiding difficult conversations, I wasn't only selling myself short. I grew up in the Midwest. While all difficult conversations are unique, it doesn’t mean you can’t prepare for them. There are dozens of books on the topic of difficult, crucial, challenging, important (you get the idea) kinds of conversations. When you do need to address something that could potentially create strife at work, you’ll want to have a strategy to use to approach your coworker with the right attitude and in a way that will potentially leave your relationship as strong as it ever was. It's time to invest in face-to-face training that empowers employees to have difficult conversations, says Tamekia MizLadi Smith. They’re awkward, sometimes unpleasant but, ultimately, inevitable in any workplace dynamic. Difficult conversations at work. by Judy Ringer. Watch our webinar, How Leaders and Leadership Collectives Can Increase Psychological Safety at Work, and learn how to promote psychological safety to foster trust, creativity, collaboration, and innovation across the organization. Be direct, get right to the point. https://ideas.ted.com/3-steps-to-having-difficult-but-necessary-conversations All leaders have difficult conversations at some point in time, whether it’s telling an employee they aren’t getting a raise or a promotion, disciplining poor performance, or … Whether the perpetrator is a coworker, a reporting staff person, or maybe even, your boss, you owe it to them for workplace harmony and serenity, and workplace cleanliness and wellness to hold a difficult conversation. It’s time to invest in face-to-face training that empowers employees to have difficult conversations, says Tamekia MizLadi Smith. Asking for a raise, persuading somebody that your idea is right and/or theirs is wrong, giving bad news to a supplier or direct report- nobody in their right mind enjoys these situations. We Have to Talk: A Step-By-Step Checklist for Difficult Conversations . People are usually reluctant to open a difficult conversation out of fear of the consequences. Conversations about race are difficult and challenging because they are deeply emotional and trigger strongly held beliefs about identity and fairness. Most everyone dreads the difficult, challenging conversation. If a difficult conversation comes with a very real risk that they will get up and leave your life, let’s call that a reward for your honesty and be done with it. Then let’s go. Part 4 of the TED Radio Hour episode Dialogue And Exchange. Here are some strategies on how to talk about politics without getting into a fight. Instead, hang around them in a non-demanding or -threatening way before saying anything. that will inspire bosses and employees alike to communicate with compassion and respect. Difficult conversations are, well, difficult. However, being able to have a tough talk or deliver unwelcome news – telling someone they’re not getting that raise, intervening when a direct report’s behavior is off base, reviewing the performance of a team member whose work is falling short – is a core skill that all IT leaders or managers must master. The reward at the other side of a tough talk is much greater than opting out of the conversation and can allow us to work better together, understand different perspectives, practice empathy, and grow as individuals. Don't say "can we talk? They're just samples of the types of behavior that cry out for responsible feedback . At times, I’ll take a book and just plunk myself on a chair in my daughter’s room. Develop your communication skills to improve your relationships, teamwork, and business performance. Lead Have a Complicated Relationship With Feedback? Have you encountered any of these examples of behavior that warrant a difficult conversation? In a witty, provocative talk, Smith shares a workplace training program called “I’m G.R.A.C.E.D.” that will inspire bosses and employees alike to communicate with compassion and respect. Great. Start your conversation with a statement that acknowledges that the topic is difficult, sensitive, confrontational, or touchy. Difficult conversations are an unfortunate yet inevitable part of life. Talk about how to keep communication open as you go forward. About Celeste Headlee's TED Talk. This has helped me as a … One of the biggest challenges in my years as a recovering pleaser was how to tell people the things I thought they didn't want to hear. Think of a conversation you’ve been putting off. There are dozens of books on the topic of difficult, crucial, challenging, fierce, important (you get the idea) conversations. This widely popular TED talk offers insights on how to take advantage of these difficult situations in efforts to make the audience cooperate, communicate the right information and wait for the best service that can be delivered to them. Those times when you know you should talk to someone, but you don’t. Then let’s go. Difficult conversations: Most people don't like them, but we all need to have them at times. Typically, when the conversation does occur the parties think and feel a lot more than they actually say. Learn how to have difficult conversations with colleagues, employees, and managers. There is great risk in failing to have these conversations in a respectful way because they can have profound consequences throughout the workplace, leading to issues with morale, group cohesion, and, in serious cases, employee retention. Difficult conversations are anything that someone does not want to talk about, such as asking for a raise or complaining to a neighbor about his barking dog. Culture. Great. In this TED Talk, David recounts how she became the “master of being OK” on the outside while struggling with her emotions on the inside, just to survive in a “culture that values relentless positivity.” Rigid denial of our feelings is not sustainable, she argues. We’ve all been there. We must have conversations, so we can eventually reach a compromise. Lea agrees, “Difficult conversations are opportunities for increased awareness, mutual understanding, and growth.” How to Have These Conversations. In a witty, provocative talk, Smith shares a workplace training program called "I'm G.R.A.C.E.D." Got it? It's a production method that originated in Toyota's operating model back in the 1930s. Whatever your business conundrum, there’s a TED Talk for that—whether you want to learn how to land that promotion, set smart goals, undo injustice at work, or unlock the next big innovation. How to handle difficult conversations with your teen effectively in order to have an open dialogue about tough topics and become closer. You know when you have to talk to Justin about how he keeps showing up 45 minutes late or Ashley because she’s underdelivering on projects? Probably to talk about lean manufacturing, just so our listeners have an idea of what we're talking about, lean manufacturing and lean production is something. They called it the Toyota Way. SHARE ON: A Reasonable Guide To Talking Politics & Issues That Matter This Holiday Season. The hardest part is working up the courage to embark on such a nerve-wracking discussion. Bottom line: always let people know why their work matters. Think about how you'll begin the conversation. 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